ive gotten my panties all twisted now because ive been thinking on some issues that have presented themselves to me.
let me back story a little bit.
im such an extreme loyalist. ask my friends, ask my family, ask people that float in my atmosphere. i will bleed myself out to help a friend or loved one. (almost to the point of fucking myself over….gotta work on that). i am all about justice. and if i encounter someone that cant take care of themselves or who has been victimized i dont hesitate to jump in. sometimes this is good, sometimes i need to chill out.
i have teenage girls that read my blogs. they also have requested me on facebook. needless to say, i have developed relationships with people through this computer screen.
i always wanted to be a big sister. never was, and im such an attention whore that if my parents did actually have another kid after me i probably wouldve shit myself and it wouldve been all out war. (at least i can admit my weaknesses 🙂 )
anyway, i like to take people under my wing.
and offer advice…(i know so scary to receive my direction right…?)
anyway, i got a message last night from a friend* who is having trouble at home. she is having problems with her family situation and i assume feels that she has no voice.
i was always raised to respect your elders. the Bible even says it. i get it. EVERYONE should be respected, so like i said, i get it.
but parents, respect your children. pay attention to what they are crying out for. listen to what their needs are. love them like children, but treat them as highly functioning human beings because thats what they are. honor your children as they can in fact honor you in return. one begets the other.
LISTEN to your children.
INVEST in your children.
they are your divine legacy.
they are what is marking this world and your great work in this lifetime.
HONOR yourselves by honoring them.
we all start with a full capacity to love as infants. then through shit and turmoil and happenstance we begin to close off our love to those around. and by the time we become adults to have children of our own, we have forgotten how to extend this love that seems to be gone at this point. fill your kids up with love. fill them back up. they will receive it, i promise.
i am not by ANY means coming down on parents. kids need to recognize as well, who is boss at the end of the day. its that simple.
i remember i kept shitting on my curfew at one stage in my rebellion. my dad came and hunted me down (he always had the sick intuition of a woman. there was no hiding from the small asian man with super powers). we were in his truck driving home down I-10 east, and he said, “natalie, this isnt burger king, you cant have it your way.” now, i look back and i craaaaaack up, because it was quite clever to use a commercial catch-phrase at the time in a severe reprimand. very creative. but at the time, i snapped to because i knew he would light me on fire if i didnt get the memo quickly and on his time frame. it was a blessing i know NOW, that i was given boundaries. otherwise, i wouldve been hell on wheels (more so than i am now, and nobody would be able to appreciate that). it takes a lot im sure to be a parent. more than i can even register in my own feeble, selfish mind.
and i just want to say, i dont have kids of my own for this very reason. i dont know what i want from day to day much less having it together enough to provide for a little one….no thanks, i dont wish that pressure on anyone as i feel i would fall short. so, mad respect to parents who work their asses off, put hot food on the table, manage a family and a household, and still find time to drop the rat off to ball/dance/piano practice. i couldnt do it.
all i want to encourage here is that if there is any little extra inside, transform it into a listening ear, a dollop of new found respect, or even just a securing hug. thats all.
and kids….quit jackin around….be kind.
all my love-